Wednesday, June 22, 2016


I hate social media. Yet I'm attached to it like it is oxygen. I thought by not watching the news I'd be free of things that could bring me down, but being on social media is allowing the bad news to be brought to me on a silver platter. 

Of course this is my own fault. I can't blame Mark Zuckerberg for inventing Facebook or other people for creating Path and Instagram. I'm also not blaming those who are in my friends list for liking and sharing things that are not rainbows and puppies. I'm blaming no one but my self.

The news have been especially terrible lately. I know there's always bad things happening; wars, famine, people fleeing from their homes and being turned down by fellow humans, AIDS, cancer, and other shit-fests are always happening. Somebody somewhere is having the worst day of their life and somehow I'm still lucky enough that I'm still doing well. Grand, even. So I'm thankful for still being here and moving and loving and just living.

But still, I found myself trying to simply breathe this morning because I felt suffocated. It's like one bad news after another keeps coming our way. And people are angry and terrified and suspicious and tired. I'm all of those things and more.

I still can't believe that there was another mass shooting. I still can't believe that an individual could come into a place, took out his machine gun, and started shooting at everyone in that place. I still can't believe that hate and hate alone could do that. Heck, I still can't believe that Sandy Hook happened. I'm terrified for my daughter and my husband and myself. I feel like there's no safe place if people could get killed at schools, places of worship, movie theaters! For F's sake, what the hell is wrong with humans?

And while we're talking about humans, here's my two cents about how we treat animals. We suck! We, as a society, SUCK. How are we still putting animals in captivities for our own entertainment? How are we still letting wild animals get murdered and butchered? How are we even paying to see that said animals get exploited or cut to pieces for the sake of tourism and education? That is SICK! I know a lot of people would disagree with me on this and honestly, I don't care.

I feel so helpless. And it's infuriating!

Sunday, June 19, 2016

Sunday Morning at Its Best!

I did not realize how much time I had for myself before Lila came along. To think about the things I could easily do then make me smile now. Even grocery shopping or heck, going to the restroom, is tricky now. I had too much time for my own good then!

I am just going through the posts in this blog and reading every thing all over again. Don't get me wrong, I love Lila more than I love life itself and definitely more than this blog, but man do I miss writing and yoga. Not doing yoga at home with the aid of Youtube, but going to classes. More specifically, my teacher's yoga classes. I also miss teaching them.

Writing is something I can do just with a pen and paper. The part of writing I miss the most is the where I am alone with my laptop and music that can get me in the mood to write. Also those times in between writing where I could just gaze into nothing and let my head think (or go wild) in peace. Like now. Oh how I'm cherishing this moment. It's lacking coffee (because we ran out), but still this is a glorious time for me. Lila and Aris are still sleeping (because it's Sunday and it's 6.20 AM) and I have the house (aside from the bedroom) all for myself. Even the dogs are still too lazy to bug me. Any moment Lila can wake up and demand breakfast. But it hasn't happened and so I'm just enjoying this. This peace and quiet. This moment with my laptop and tunes that get me going.

Sunday morning at its best!