Wednesday, January 26, 2011

I Forgot How to Be Compassionate

Almost everyday now, I wake up with a good intention in my heart. I want to be compassionate to other people and beings through my actions and the words I say or write. Oh, and I want to start meditating. Regularly.

As always, it is always easier said than done. I have not started the meditation even for a single minute. I aim for 10 minutes per day, at least. And on being a compassionate person, well, I thought I was trying hard enough, but now I know that trying and actually doing it are two completely different things.

I thought I was being compassionate with the way I approach all sorts of situations and people. I thought I was being the "good guy" by thinking that I am being compassionate. Alas I was only being vain and conceited, thinking I was better than everyone else. Well, I am not. Now I know that I was actually at the bottom rank.

Again, it took me something awful if not hurtful to figure this out. I really am a slow learner. Through an experience I just had today, I realized that I need to be in a true compassionate state to actually be compassionate. Thus words are kinder, acts are nicer and forgiveness is always given.

Most of all, being compassionate is about realizing that everybody has their own burden, knowing where they came from and approaching them as I want to be approached. And to realize that, I need to be present, not taking account of previous episodes, because really, what happens now matter the most.

Compassion comes from love and love is kind.

I hope the universe conspire. Amen.



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